Case of the {Mommy} Mondays...on a Tuesday

Straight from Office Space...I've got a case of the Mondays.  To make it worse, I call it the {Mommy} Mondays.  Let's not forget...it's Tuesday.

I miss my baby girl.  I've grown accustomed to our routine - me working and Emma going to mother-in-laws Monday - Friday.  That doesn't meant I like it though.  Emma is changing so much lately.  Every day seems new and fresh to her.  She's so aware and learning so much.  I feel my time to get to know her, to witness her new skills, and to document her milestones is so limited.  I spend every waking moment I can with her, but it's never enough.

I know alot of this is brought on by the fact that tomorrow will be Emma's first visit to a park.  Mother-in-law will take her to the playground and she'll get to swing for the first time.  I'm going to miss it.  Sure, to some, the park and swinging for the first time is kind of lame.  I mean, it's not like she's saying "ma ma" or "da da" or even taking her first step.  Still, my heart ached when Ryan told me their plans.  He offered to go another day, a day when I could go too, but I know that that isn't right.  I cannot and will not hold Emma back from experiencing life to it's fullest just because I cannot be present in body with her.  There will be many more activities to come in her future that I unfortunately will not be able to attend because I am a full time working mother.  It sucks.  I'm so thankful that the "village" surrounding my daughter to help raise her is family, but the desire to be with her and to not miss a single second of her life never waivers.

I must remember that the life lessons I am teaching my daughter.  I must remember that she is learning to be independent.  I must remember that she is learning to explore and decide what she likes and dislikes apart from me.  I am teaching her to be confident, self aware, and secure within herself.

It's still hard...for me.

I hope she has fun tomorrow.  I truly hope she loves the playground and the swings.  And on my next day off, we will have a mommy and Emma play date.  I will take her to the swings and we will create our own memories.

Is it 5:00 yet???  I'm ready to snuggle my baby girl...