Faceless Portrait

This week's photo challenge with Our Reflection:  "Faceless Portraits"

I have to admit, the part of me that needs to understand the background and technical parts of everything decided to google it.  Sure, I could have defined "Faceless Portraits" myself, but I needed a starting point, a guide, an understanding of the direction this specific abstract was meant to go in.  My findings -- be creative!  The object is to take a photo that would defy the typical posed, poised, planned photograph.  Look away, not to, the eyes, and find depth, emotion, passion, beauty, grace, a moment with objects, body language, surroundings.  I spent an entire day trying to think of just how I was going to do this.  What story could I tell?  What is it that I want need to convey at this very point in time in my life, this week, these moments.  This challenge became more than just fooling with my camera.  It became about determination to express myself....to myself.  What is my faceless portrait?

This.

I took this today, 25 weeks 4 days pregnant.  The most pregnant I've ever been.  You can read this picture however you want.  The words, the story, the heart is endless.  I both love this child and grieve for the one I lost at the same time.  I hope for a future and remember a dream.  I am thankful, sad, happy, healing, lost, found, nervous, scared, hopeful.  This is my life now.  This is the place where I am both peaceful and excited simultaneously.  I have built hopes here.  I have cried many tears here.  I have been broken here.  I have learned to heal here.  I am a mother -- to an angel baby-son and to this unborn, but most desired rainbow daughter.

This is my faceless portrait.  Even if I wasn't telling my own story, I would have cried when I saw this photo. Tears of sorrow and tears of joy.  For all the baby-loss-moms and all those you hope to meet and keep their rainbow babies.